~*because i got high....

Thursday, July 26, 2007

*~Exercise caution when reading: Woman in hissy fit down below... for make sense, my friends, it may not...

I just had an epiphany. Ok, it’s not like something that I’ve just found out, but today, is the day I'm finally done with it. Enough of taking/giving these kinds of chances, in the name of NOT being picky. After a bout of bad, bad luck with guys from my own ethnic group, I've decided that I am done with Chinese guys. I am sorry if there are any Chinese boys reading this beside my dear Pimpy friend. You guys can be real good friends of mine, and great boyfriends to loads of other chicks, but not mine.

Having a westernized lifestyle, speaking in accents (fake or otherwise), came back from spending some time abroad, supposedly open-minded about sex - which turns out, as I’ve discovered very recently, can be confused with just being another pervert/horndog or whatever you may call it – is NOT the same as having a westernized mentality. I am NOT in anyway glorifying the westernized mentality, merely stating what the soon to be ex BF said about his lifestyle etc. when i said that he is a chinese boy with a chinese mentality in my answer to his "What do you think of me?" question. And, that i do not comply well with my very own ethnic group's general mentality and expectations.

Also, asking me what I am wearing or am I good in bed, telling me how badly you want me and all equally disturbing texts, just a couple of days into our “relationship” via phone (yes we met online, been friends for a couple of months, he owns a record shop near my workplace but yes, no excuse - I am that dumb) – AND trying to convince me afterwards that you were just trying to “sweet talk” me with those stuff, and that you only talk like that to the person you “love”(??? Like Seriously?) will not, I assure you, get you anywhere near to what I am wearing. I really don't know which is worse - him really convinced that his dirty, looking for booty calls type of messages are "innocent sweet nothings", or that if he really is that big of a perv.

I know... I know, pervs are pervs ARE pervs regardless of ethnicity, but this is not about what a perv my very soon to be ex “bf” is, it is about how I will not, if I can help it, date another Chinese guy, ever.
I know... I know, never say never, but of all that I’ve met/dated, it saddens me a great deal that none has proven my perceptions otherwise.

I am going to have one hell of a tough night tonight, folks. I've come to a conclusion, after a lot of deliberation and rationalizing, which was actually made easy, thanks to a phone call from him this afternoon, I’ve decided to not prolong this anymore. Hate doing this. It’s like cutting a lifeline and having to bear with the what ifs afterwards, but I know that this is the right thing to do. What else is there if you don’t fit mentally? Or more accurately getting increasingly disgusted by the day.
I am so, not the happiest girl right now.


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