~*because i got high....

Monday, April 16, 2007

~*I wanna be a rockstar... I guess...

Ok, this is what I actually wanted to write about.
So, we were at this bar last Friday night, the ol folk's playground place. There was this band playing. A foreign band. The lead, some foreign dude with a hot, hot physique (wanted to put "bod" but sounds porn-ish, doesn't it?). The girls were just all over him, the girls who were with me included.

I can't stop looking, well more like staring, which brings us to another problem I have, i stare. I am a starer. Sometimes... well, most of the time actually, I don't even realize I am doing it, and frequently freak people out with my "innocent" staring.

Oh, pardon the deviation. Anyways, as I was staring... I mean saying, I sure was staring at the bloke, NOT because of his hot physique or anything, but because he reminds me a lot of someone I've dated a couple of years back, who was also a lead in another band. Met him after a nite out in town, when he came and chat me up on my way to get my ride.

Made me reminisce, of course. And then I look at the girls there that night, fawning over him, and I thought to myself... been there, done that sistas. And it sure wasn't all a bed of roses, despite the g.l.a.m.o.r.o.u.s. front.
It WAS really just a front.

Sure, guys in bands are appealing. The fact that they are in a band automatically increases their level of hotness, and it's also very seducing to suddenly find yourself belonging to a "cool" group, sitting at the best seats at clubs, reveling in dagger stares from chicks who were not very glad that it was you and not them who get to chummy up with him. But then, there's also the player factor, the "we're together but you're not my girl yet" factor, the "I have feelings for you but can't commit to a serious relationship right now because I love my job so much and it's taking me all over the world and you might not get to see me a few months at a time, but you can wait for me" factor, the "staying up till wee hours if you wanna hang out since his work hours are the opposite of yours" factor... AND sadly but true, the "they aren't always the brightest bulbs around" factor. Seriously.

So, yea, I missed the "exciting" times, I missed being amongst the "in" crowd, and as I sat staring, I realized that I've missed the person most,regardless. We've shared quite a bit together, but I know that I can't go back there again, to being the girlfriend but not quite person to anyone ever again.
Sigh... I am getting old.


  • At 9:36 AM, Blogger Noor Azlin Shah said…

    No lah.. I wont put it as 'old'.. Its just a sign of maturity for me.. Cheer up kay.. ;)


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